Pregnancy Journey

How I found out that I'm pregnant.

Well, I was 5 days late. But never in my mind that I thought I'm pregnant. I felt all these period cramps or what not so ingat aah mesti lambat lah ni. But somehow, I have this so called instinct to try out for pregnancy test. Konon fortune teller sangatlah kan....actually, that time I was watching a documentary about giving birth. Dalam dok tengok 'coiih baby tu keluaq' I realized that I was weeping in tears! Like emo tears! I have this sort of fondness feeling. It is so hard to describe but it just rasa special sort of 'it' moment. Right there and then I started my car and went to Watson beli pregnancy kit test. Haahahahahahahha! Of course lah balik tu terus try. Masa tu dah petang so I tested and tak nampak apa. Ada very faint line. Like really faint line there tapi I macam hmmmm tak sure. Told my husband about it and he was like, "don't you test lagi lah nanti frustrated". Well, sir yes sir! (mulut ja cakap tapi dalam hati dah pikiaq hari apa nak test hat lain pulak)

Then that weekend my sister balik Penang, was telling her about my period cramps or what not and she told me that mula-mula pregnant memang rasa macam tu! Err...I dare not to have any emotion, hope or what not. Then, on Monday early morning right after Subuh I test lagi sekali. (Oh, did I mentioned I bought 4 pregnancy test kits??!) I was heck nervous. I feel so excited and at the same time macam lalalala tak dak tak pa boleh try lagi...baru kahwin sebulan setengah ja pun...

When the time come, there it were... two visible lines. Not too dark but clear enough. I am pregnant! :) I called my sister directly and she was like you are pregnant! Go to a clinic for confirmation!! So I did, I went to this one particular clinic in Tanjung Tokong told her I'm doing this and that. The doctor scanned my perut ok! Memanglah tak nampak apa! She don't even buat urine test! Punyalah geram. Then I went to another clinic at Pulau Tikus and the doctor asked me to do urine test and there it is.. :) the magic lines :) It was still early though..doctor asked me to wait around 2 weeks then only cari gynae. So I listened to her.

So after korek sana korek sini, both husband and I decided to choose Adventist Hospital partly because it's near my mom's house, I have medical record there and hubby was born there. Perfect! The doctor is really nice :) Saw and heard the baby's heartbeat  for the very first time was wonderful! Subhanallah punyalah rasa happy.

So, the first two months 

 I mengalami simptom-simptom mild alahan...sakit kepala nonstop, hilang selera makan, muntah..you name it. Both my mother and sister had a smooth pregnancy journey where none of them experience any alahan. Lucky them girls! I'm a caffeine addict so at this point I decided to stop, banned, boycott any caffeine intake. Separa gila jugakla kan....makan Popsicle EVERY SINGLE DAY! I bought Tesco for kids something like that yang 40% less sugar and made from real fruit juice ka apa ka. 

By the third month, 

Alahan lagi teruk and pening sampai tak boleh bangun. Lucky my husband really take a good care of me. He really did. I no longer cook sebab tak tahan bau minyak panas. Selera makan memang zero so ended up on bed right after work. But loved to drink apple and orange juice. Went to KL by plane and was feeling good. Bab berjalan terus okay punya :)

Fourth month 

I selalu selsema and sakit badan. Selera dah mula datang balik sikit-sikit tapi letih yang amat. Masa ni emotional sangat sebab asyik clingy to my husband. Asyik nak dia ada by my side tahap dia balik kerja lambat sikit pun I dah boleh nangis rasa lonely. Gila tragedy....sabar ja lah...The doc told us it's a boy :) I start suka gila makan ketam. Nampak ketam ja I would be salivating.

Five month 

Mula rasa kuat dan boleh buat tu dan buat ni. Masa ni bulan puasa. Rasa semangat nak puasa tapi tak ada rezeki langsung tak dapat puasa sebab tahan lapar sikit I dah pening. I mesti kena makan every one hour macam tu. Even while I was teaching I have all these snacks to pop in from time to time to avoid dari shivering. Again, the doc told us it's a boy :) Went to KL again by plane and starting to have the urge to pee every 1.8 minute hahahah!  I have this new crazy craving where I would eat guava and apple every single day! Sambung makan ketam. Isk.

Six month 

Is the crucial time. Found out that my fibroid is going through red degeneration. Sakitnya tuhan saja yang tau..I seriously rasa macam is this it? Ni ka rasanya kalau mati?Was hospitalized for two nights on painkiller all the time to ease the pain. Penyiksaan yang amat sangat. I would say I really hit the rock bottom of bat shit life at this time. The doc said nothing can be done as it will harm the baby so operation is a  no go. All we can do is pray and rely on painkiller when the pain strikes. Yikes! Worst case scenario is when the pain become unbearable then we would have to opt for early pregnancy which is next month. Early pregnancy means baby will be in incubator for a looong time, so many unlikely possibilities could happened and oh boy, I'm just not ready for all that.

 

Never in my mind I thought I would go through such a hard time. After a week on painkiller, Alhamdulillah the pain is bearable it only strike once in a while. But I have to bed rest. No more work, no more active life. So I take a some sort what you call leave (I'm working part time) and here I am resting at home. I cant really move much or I would feel extremely tired and the pain datang balik.

Two weeks after I'm bed resting at home, I got a few lines on my body. Thin red lines and they are itchy. Went to panel clinic and was given calamine lotion. Applied it half bottle and boom! The rashes spread to the whole body and bloody itchy!!!!! I can't sleep for nights and I can't relax on day time. Visited my beloved doc again and he told me that it is PUPPP, hormone reaction and it will go away but I'm not that lucky because it's all over the body and it's in the worst condition. Haihs! After three days of applying new cream, now I'm much better. Less itchy, more relax. 

  

So here I am, 6 months plus going for 7 in 11 days time. So many challenges that I never heard and think about. I would say my pregnancy journey so far has been very educational. I learned LOTS of motherhood to be world, about being a woman, a wife and most importantly I learned a lot about the importance of having faith and hope. 

 

Well, hopefully I have three more months to enjoy and learn throughout this beautiful journey :) to my husband, I am the luckiest woman to have you by my side supporting me each and every minute here. God knows what good deeds have I done in the past to be blessed with such a caring, understanding and supportive husband :) to my mom, you made me feel like a child again hehehe but you had taught me the most valuable lesson of all, the sacrifice of a mother :) With all the love and support system I have around me, I know I'll be in good care :) Insyaallah :)